Wednesday, October 18, 2006
Do you know sometimes, when people experience various emotions at some point of life,
like joy, anger, hate, surprise, sadness, jealousy, happiness...
They tend to express their emotions in their actions, speech and writing.
A person who's just been praised radiates a healthy glow in her face, her movements gay and
joyful, beaming in joy, causing others to feel good too.
A person who's just had her period broods and snaps at unknowing people, sometimes causing unecessary hurt and pain to others, making them feel hurt, perhaps mad.
A person who's just experienced a shocking event gapes and tries to make sense of the situation, penning down her thoughts in a little diary, or a blog, for all to see and read.
Sometimes a person experiences a variety of emotions in just one day, confusing his senses and mood, causing him to be grinning like a monkey this moment, brooding like a soothsayer the next.
Most people i know of express their emotions with their actions. A smile here, a slight droop of the eyebrows there, folding of the arms, fingering of hair... It's all quite obvious if you just concentrated on their actions.
Others prefer to let their mouth do the talking, so to speak. A poison barb here, a friendly word there, an acidic comment, sarcastic sentence... Really, it's so easy to get it if you listen carefully,
especially to the tone.
The rest silently pen down their feelings in poems, scribblings, drawings, diaries, blogs, forums...
Most of the time these writings are kept in private, even forgotten. With blogs and forums, it
sticks there forever, unless you delete it, of course.
Personally, i'm not one to publicly display my feelings and emotions in front of people,
especially groups of people. I usually keep quiet and observe what the other person is doing and what she says. In little talks and debates in school or outside i would just stay silent and listen.
Listening is important, ironically, the more you talk, the less they listen, the more you listen, the more they listen to you. But sometimes i'm seen as unfriendly or cold, please, i'm not anywhere near that. I only tend to be my other self around close friends and family. The other part of me.
I just need, to put it bluntly, to 'analyse' you more and know you better. When people impose their feelings onto me, whether positive or negative, I always hope to respond in what i think is
a positive way. But when people impose their negative feelings... I try to understand your emotion and perhaps help you if i could. But hurtful words and poisonous barbs... I laugh them off, but deep down inside i feel the same as you and me and everyone. I remember once in Sec 1,
in Home Econs lesson, the class was told to tell each other what they thought of each other. I vividly remembered being described as a robot, feelingless, cold, lifeless. Well maybe i am, but i hope that i could change that image of mine. I started to express my emotions through my actions and speech rather than my writings. I acted like an 'enthu kia' during my Sec 2 year, hoping to gain recognition and get a personality of my very own. Well, other than some failed businesses and broken windows i managed to come out quite unscathed. Or so i thought.
After some painful incidents and confrontations, i don't think i can ever pull that kind of stunt again. Going back to penning down your personal thoughts in poems and blogs seems a welcome
change. At least you don't run as big a risk as expressing them in actions and speech.
At least you don't offend and hurt others as easily.
You get time to think before you say or do anything.
If that will prevent unsightly hurtful events from happening.
To anyone. Everyone. Anyone.
I hope i will.
But there's the other part of me, who wants to be more expressive outwardly.
I don't want to bottle up feelings anymore.
No more.
Cha tah.
(When i was writing this i was as moody as Mad Eye Moody, so pardon me.)
( I'm quite fine now, just hope that post doesnt offend any body)
(Thank You For Your Kind Attention)
(Cha tah)
popiah
5:50 PM
0 unpassionate people:
Everything i do, i do with passion
